Machine Gun Preacher??

So...I dove in and went to see this film while on vacation in AZ as it happened to be playing there in limited release. I went in hoping to be inspired and I left confused and unsure about it all. Here is the premise. Sam Childers ( a real person played in the film by Gerard Butler) is a former drug addict and biker gang member. He becomes a Christian and while on a mission trip to Africa, is moved by the horrible things taking place in Southern Sudan. Children are being kidnapped, forced to kill their own family members, sold into sex slavery, having their lips and arms hacked off, etc. etc. by the members of the demonic and evil Lord's Resistance Army. He decides to fight back and build a church/orphanage and work with the Sudanese Liberation Army. In the film we see him killing LRA soldiers and saving many children. We also see how hate begins to fill his heart as he constantly is torn between what he sees and his faith in Christ. This is where the film gets tricky...is it right to war against our enemies to the point of hunting them down and killing them? How does Christ see this? I am not making a judgment call at all here...I myself am torn. God tells us to stand up for justice and to protect the poor and the weak...which I believe Sam is and has done...but up to what point? Do we go out and kill?

In one scene of the film, a humanitarian aid worker tells Sam that his methods are just adding to the problem. She says, "We have enough guns"...Sam replies, "You fight your way, I'll fight mine"...(my paraphrase)....She then reminds him that the LRA's leader also began in a similar way, believing that by killing, he was fighting for justice...but look at him now...he is evil personified...

This is the warning that really got to me. When we begin to kill for what we believe are the "right reasons"...there are indoubtedly those on the opposite side who disagree and think that we are the "right ones to kill"...Obviously, there is NEVER a justification for killing and harming innocent children and families just trying to live out their lives...so I am in no way saying that the LRA is a good organization...the question remains...how then DO we fight as Christians? Jesus tells us to love our enemy...to offer the other cheek if we are struck on the first by an enemy...to go the extra mile when having been forced to go the first one...when sued to give more than we are being sued for...how does this line up when children's lives are being taken? Do we gather guns and fight fire with fire? What about not being overcome by evil but overcoming evil with good? How do we do that when we are faced with the most horrific evil you can imagine? What about the scripture that tells us God is pleased when his people "Love not their lives unto death.." meaning that they are willing to die before renouncing what Christ has done for them. Do we let ourselves be murdered if we can not escape? Do we fight back weapon for weapon?

This is not an easy question for me...it "seems" right to fight militarily when innocents are being killed...but is it? Do we instead put ourselves in the line of fire on their behalf and suffer death with them?

I think back to Nazi Germany. What if those who were ordered to kill, instead refused and were willing to die with their Jewish neighbors? If there had been no one willing to fight for Hitler, but all were willing to die instead, who would have started the war? One man? I just watched a documentary about young people today who were willing to say that they would kill and bury alive Jewish people if they would be killed for not obeying. They would kill others to save themselves for a few more years. This is today people...in AMERICA...

I would hope that, if I was ever in that type of position, I would have the peace of my salvation and say as Paul did, "To live is Christ, to die is gain" and allow myself to be killed instead. After all, isn't the most loving thing someone can do is to lay their lives down for a friend? Isn't that what scripture teaches us?

So...is Sam Childers wrong? I don't know. I believe he is doing the best he can in a horrible situation. Faced with the same choices, I don't know how I would choose to handle myself. I am sure some of his life was embellished to make a Hollywood movie more exciting or intense...but hopefully, he is seeking peace before war. Prayer before bullets.

A bride begrudging...

I have a confession..I don't always serve with a compliant and happy heart. *gasp* I know, I know...shocking. I struggle with being thankful and giving cheerfully. I dislike sacrifice and hard work when something fun is out there waiting. Actually, it doesn't have to even be fun, it just has to be EASIER...isn't that sad?
In church this week, we were reminded that a Christian is part of a culture of sacrifice. Not for the notoriety of being a martyr or some kind of badge of honor recipient...but for the joy. Yes..for the JOY of sacrifice. Is that even possible you might ask? Let me tell you a little story...of how God might see what he receives from us, and why we might just be better off keeping our little tokens if we can't give them in the right attitude.

A few weeks back, was my birthday (and in the same week always falls Valentines Day..which also happens to be the anniversary of my engagement to my hubby)...this particular year, my husband was on a missions trip to Ghana, West Africa and missed both. In addition, finances have been mucho tight and so...I did not receive anything but a phone call and well wishes from him via Skype. I tend to be a gift LOVING person..it's one of my love languages...and so I was hoping that despite the trip and despite the finances, my husband would pony up and surprise me with a gift that I had expressed interest in multiple times (hint ,hint!) Alas, this was not to be. Casting reason and logic aside, I continued to hound him about said item and "lovingly" hinted about it, threw it around in random conversation, mentioned it in his vicinity to others, etc. All in all, being very annoying...(Did I just admit that in writing???) I wanted this sacrifice from him SO badly...wanted to know that he loved me to the point of doing something unwise financially just to make me feel like he cared. (I am so sad sometimes...I digress...)
This led to a climactic scene in Best Buy when I Oh, so gently showed him what I wanted in person and touted all it's magnificence. I even used my sweet and tender voice. Can you believe he still said NO and we had to walk out of that store together lacking in the precious device???!!
This is where my finest moment occurred....I threw a fit. I whined, I begged, I tried to use guilt to get my way...and then, you know what...I annoyed him so greatly, that he turned around and started to walk back into the store. He was so mad, he was going to buy it for me! Ah! Success! Right? Nope. At that moment, I didn't want it anymore. I mean, I did want IT, just not that way. How could I enjoy a gift given to me just to get me off his back? Was that REALLY what I wanted? No...what I wanted was the heart behind the gift...and if I got the gift, but not his heart...I wouldn't even be able to enjoy it. It would be a constant reminder that I got my way, but lost my husband. Not worth it. Not at all.

This makes me think of our Lord and Father. He asks us for things all the time (albeit not in my fallen annoying way)...our obedience, our time, our finances, but what he is really after is our hearts. If we do all he asks, but only to "get Him off our backs"...is that really what he wants from us? Remember Cain and Abel?...two brothers, two sacrifices. What made one acceptable over the other? The heart behind the sacrifice. To one brother, Abel, it was a gift to God, showing His love. The other, an offer made out of compulsion...out of necessity...out of wrong motives. Both brothers were revealing their hearts to God, only one was giving his TO God.
Now let's look at the ultimate gift, Jesus Christ. He went to the cross. Why? Out of sheer necessity? Did he hem and haw about it and make a big scene? No. He gave freely. He gave with joy. He gave in love. This is how WE know what love is...Jesus Christ, laid down His life, for us! And honestly, we didn't even know we wanted or needed him to! It was heaven's great surprise of love. We didn't even have to ask!

Is there something that God has been asking of you? Have you been giving to Him out of the wrong motivations? Perhaps fear or obligation have motivated you. Maybe this the the time to sit down and think about why you are doing what you are doing...and get your heart right with God about it. Change your attitude from one that is like a bride begrudging (or in my case a groom) to one who looks forward to the giving of whatever has been asked for. Because unlike sad little me...God never whines or throws a fit to get his way. He simply waits, heart open, arms open, for his bride to give Him their most valuable possession...themselves.

The Scriptures say...

I was browsing quickly through Luke and my eye caught upon something...The temptation in the wilderness of Christ. I found it so interesting that the first two times the devil tempts Jesus...he simply tempts using his own ideas...and Jesus replies to both with Scripture...but the THIRD time...satan uses Scripture to try and trap Jesus. He tries to beat Jesus with his own words! As a Christian who has seen abuses of the Word of God used to perpetuate hateful ideas and actions.. I find this alarming! It puts a whole new urgency in my heart to rightly divide the Word of Truth.

The Joy of Stability

I have to write this before I forget it...cuz that is how my brain is..I get a thought...LOVE IT...and then tend to forget it after the moment strikes. I was thinking about my current financial situation and how my emotions have been tied to it being either good or bad. I realized this is a horrible and fearful way to live. Why should my happiness be determined by my finances which can one day be here and then be gone tomorrow (or right now for example...ha ha!)? Is this any way to have joy? To be tied to something so liquid, so unsure? NOOOOO!
Then, as that thought passed, I thought, "Well then, what is always stable?" The answer: GOD. He tells us in his word that he never changes. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. How is that for stability? That is something you can hitch your horse to! What a joy to know that God is there, and he never goes away..he never leaves, never forsakes. He doesn't go up and down like stocks, in and out like people, back and forth like opinions...he stands...he is the "I AM". He doesn't go anywhere because he is EVERYWHERE. He is what holds our world together...if he left, we would cease to be. SO..when we wake up and take our first breath each day, we can be SURE he is there and is not leaving us alone. Our very life depends on his being there and not having changed his mind about keeping this whole thing going! What peace!
So...with that said I am going to take another breath and thank him for being right there to give it to me...whether I a have a dollar or not!

Heavy Reading

I just finished a book by Francis Shaeffer, founder of L'Abri in Switzerland...He was a philosopher and theologian which makes reading his work extremely challenging for me. He speaks of things and people of which I have no knowledge...so I have to look up a lot or get REALLY good at gleaning the meaning from the surrounding passage....with that said, I wanted to post what I wrote down while reading...There isn't much real flow to what I am about to write..but I am going to post it exactly as I wrote it and exactly as the ideas came to me. Some of what is written is my condensation of Shaeffer's work, some of it is what came to my mind out of the inspiration of his work...I hope it gets you thinking!

Here goes:

1) Because God "IS", we can therefore exist and even have the possibility of existing.

2) Man is not reduced to a "machine". He is not a "zero" or a sum of random meaninglessness. He is created in the image of his creator adn therefore, though small and finite, he has a value and a worth that is outside of himself. He has meaning and value BECAUSE he is created ON PURPOSE by an EXISTING CREATOR.

3) Man is not "intrinsically" evil. Man was not always as he is now. At one point, man rebelled and cruelty entered. Man, as he is now, is abnormal from what he once was. ie: fallen.
This allows for God to be wholly good and man, by choice, has brought about evil.

4) Since man is abnormal compared to original design, and because he has value as a created being, created by a good God who exists, then it follows that there IS HOPE in restoring man to what he was supposed to be.
- This is where Christ begins to make sense.

In order to believe the above, you can't hold to the idea that man is simply randomly ordered matter and has no real significance against all other forms of matter.

"In order to please God, one must first believe that he exists and that he is a rewarder of those who earnestly seek him".

"Without faith, it is impossible to please God".

2 types of "faith":

- God exists.
-God does not exist.

We won't know anything exhaustively, but we CAN know truly. True-truth.

Human beings desperately want to know and be known. Without a belief in God, there are no absolutes and therefore nothing, including ourselves, can be truly known. There will always be some level of uncertainty, distrust, and cynicism.
The Bible talks MUCH about knowing and being known by God.
God "knows" us or he doesn't "know" us. Hell is a place of eternal unknowing. Total isolation from God and others. We must know God to be truly known. HE is our creator and by denying his existance, we, in essence, deny our own existence. Without Him, we are not. If He doesn't absolutely exist, neither do we. A created thing must have a creator or that thing never truly was. When we die in our unbelief, we enter an eternal realm in which our denial of God inevitably means our denial of self. We cease to be, yet we are. This knowledge is eternal torment. Complete isolation from others, locked in our own knowledge that we do exist, but alone forever.

Christianity is not a blind "leap of faith", but gives us the go ahead to ask the sufficient questions and then believe Him and bow before Him. It is not a lobatomy of reason. A true Christian takes life experience, lines this up with the claims of the Bible and see that they fit to his or her satisfaction. This is the point of faith..or rather the beginning of faith. And God himself gives us this faith. (Which is why some accept it more readily than others with less questions....greater faith given by God perhaps?) It is not sheer deduction but deductions being revealed as truth to the seeker. At every doubt along the path of the believer, the person must revisit his intitial questions, take into account the Biblical answers and say, " In light of this new question/doubt, does my belief/faith still stand?" This is where prayer and continued seeking take place until a suitable answer is found...where faith in the initial conclusion can carry a believer until the answer comes. It can also be, I believe, where faith can be abandoned and the initial conclusion aborted. The true believer, one who endures til the end, is the one who hangs on for the answer, trusting the reliability of previous answers and in the truth of the goodness of their God.

Francis gives an example of "faith" vs. FAITH:
Climbers in the alps reach a foggy area where one can not see anywhere around him....the guide keeps leading them onward until they are completely lost and blinded by the fog...one climber asks, "If we keep on like this, what will happen? " The guide says, "You will die"...So the climber says, " Suppose I jump off the egde and land on a cliff, then what? " The guide says, " You will live another day." So the climber, on that word alone, jumps.
Another climber asks the same questions but upon asking about jumping...he hears a voice through the fog...It claims to be a man who knows the entire mountain, every cliff and outcropping and that if he ( the climber ) jumps, he will live. The climber continues to ask questions of the voice in the fog, until he believes the voice is telling him the truth. At his point of belief, he jumps.

Faith like a Child?
Children ask lots of questions about their world ( I have 3...so I know)...but as opposed to adults, what they don't know, doesn't seem to bother them as much and they are comforted by what they see in their world as absolutes....the sun comes up and goes down every day....absolutes.
They aren't so concerned as knowing exhaustively in order to believe. They can be convinced and appeased by knowing simple truths. There is a simple trust in children that what they are being taught/ told is indeed the truth. The good parent does not exploit this trust and lie to their children. God, our good father/creator, tells us to simply believe him. We can ask questions, but we are to trust him when we can not know exhaustively and be content with the simple truth he has given to us.
Only a horrible parent would misuse the simple trust of his child in order to harm that child or cause them pain/ harm.
God is consistant. What he tells us of in his word, the Bible, is truth. He not only teaches us about himself and his character, but he warns us and tells us truth, so that we will avoid much pain and hurt.
If my son asks me if it is safe to jump from the roof, and I tell him nothing...is that a good parent? What if I tell him it is safe to jump? Again, I am being a horrible parent. The good parent, as is with our good God, tells the child what they need to know in order to live life within the safe limits of their world. It is then the responsibility of the child to believe and obey. If they do not, they will reap the consequences of those actions.
We would be wise to listen to the warnings and teachings of our Creator...to believe them and to be thankful for his guidelines and boundaries. He loves us and has given us value...he does not desire our destruction. He desires to give us life and free us from our rebellion and our abnormalities. This is the truth. And this much CAN BE KNOWN.